Famous Last Words
by wackyjacqs
Summary: "Well, are you familiar with the phrase, 'famous last words', Daniel?" The younger man rolled his eyes just as a spear flew past both their heads. "Umm, could we argue about this later?" Two-parter, based on a recent GW prompt. Set in Season 4. S/J, eventually.


**A/N: Lucy, I'm home! It's been a while, huh?**

**In all seriousness, I am so sorry for my absence. Personal issues have kept me away for the most part, while a touch of writer's block and long work hours are also to blame. (I also may have managed to squeeze in a trip to FedCon though, where I finally got to meet Richard Dean Anderson.. I'm not going to lie, that was amazing!)**

**Anyways.. I though I'd try and get back into the swing of things by writing something (hopefully!) lighthearted, and quite possibly, pointless. :)**

**This is based on a recent GW prompt, of which you had to include the phrase, "Are you familiar with the phrase, 'famous last words'?"**

**Two parter. This hasn't been beta read, so any mistakes are mine. Set sometime in Season 4. Enjoy!**

* * *

**Famous Last Words**

**(Part 1)**

"You know – I hate to say it, but – I told you – ahh!"

Jack grimaced as another sharp pain jolted through his knee. He found himself biting back a curse as he continued to half-jog, half-limp back towards the direction of the gate; but whether that was because he had crocked his left knee again, or it was because of their current situation, he hadn't yet decided.

"Things were going just fine until you –"

"Daniel!"

"What?"

"They were not – _fine_," he mumbled, trying to block out the pain coming from his leg. Janet was going to have his ass for this latest injury, he just knew it.

"We've encountered civilizations like this before."

"And it always ends up the same," Jack shot back.

"Well maybe if you were more open to other cultures –"

"Hey! I'm all for culture – but I told you not to say those words and yet – you did. Ah, shit!"

Jack sucked in a breath as he lost his footing, pain searing through his knee once more. Despite blaming Daniel for their current predicament, he was also silently thankful the man was there as he felt an arm slip around his waist in an attempt to keep him as upright as possible as they retreated to the gate.

"Don't blame me for this, Jack. All I said was –"

"_'It'll be fine'_," the Colonel finished in a slightly mocking tone. "_'What could possibly go wrong_,' you said. Well, are you familiar with the phrase, 'famous last words', Daniel?"

The younger man rolled his eyes just as a spear flew past both their heads.

"Umm, could we argue about this later?" Daniel asked in concern.

"Yeah. Let's pick it up," Jack agreed, holding his breath as they jogged a little harder, making to the crest of the hill.

As soon as they started their descent on the other side, they caught sight of Sam and Teal'c across the clearing. The gate was open, so the Colonel knew they were still briefing General Hammond on the success of the mission so far – which was ironic, considering it had just gone to hell in a handbasket and they blissfully had no idea.

Jack risked a glance over his shoulder to gauge the threat, but the unmistakable 'whooshing' sound of the gate shutting down caught his attention and he turned back around.

"Crap," he murmured.

_So much for a quick exit._

Seeing Sam and Teal'c starting to gather their supplies, he decided he'd nothing to lose, so he hollered across the clearing, feeling ever-so-slightly smug when Daniel jumped about two feet in the air in surprise.

"Dial it up!"

Sam spun around at the barked order coming from behind her. Immediately, she noticed the Colonel and how heavily he was leaning on Daniel as they both jogged unsteadily towards the gate. She started to move forward but a strange chorus of cries and shouts could be heard in the distance.

Looking past her teammates, she noticed dozens of the local inhabitants appearing from the other side of the hill, waving various primitive weapons in the air and shouting, what she gathered to be insults, in their direction. Her eyes widened.

"Dial the damn gate, Carter!" Jack repeated, grimacing as he stumbled slightly.

"Yes, Sir!" She yelled, idly noting Teal'c running by as he went to their teammates' aid.

She had just punched in the final chevron and entered the team's IDC as the three men reached her.

"Sir?"

The sweat was dripping down the Colonel's face, and his breathing was erratic. He also looked like he was about to pass out.

"Turns out the natives aren't quite so friendly," he quipped, half-heartedly ducking as another spear came hurtling their way and through the open gate.

"Let's get out of here."

She nodded. "Yes, Sir."

* * *

The four members of SG-1 landed on the ramp with a thud.

"Close the iris," Jack gasped.

"Do it!" Hammond ordered.

As the iris closed and the gate eventually shut down, silence descended in the gate room. Slowly, Sam, Daniel and Teal'c got to their feet before the Jaffa reached down to help the Colonel, who just waved off the help and chose to remain lying on the ramp – his pain evident.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Hammond turn to one of the Airmen and mentioned something about a medical team. He let out a sigh of relief and closed his eyes in an attempt to block out the spinning of the room.

"Colonel, only a minute ago, Major Carter was assuring me that negotiations were going smoothly with the people of -678. Dare I ask what's happened?"

Keeping his eyes closed, Jack licked his lips once.

"Blame Daniel," he mumbled, promptly before he passed out.

**TBC... **


End file.
